Ten ways to guarantee she's keen
1. She flashes her eyebrows at youOK, I admit it: you probably didn’t notice. That’s because it all happens in about a fifth of second. Well worth keeping your eye out for next time though because it’s a way of telling if she fancies you – before she even knows it herself! When we first see someone we’re attracted to, our eyebrows rise and fall in a small, rapid movement. If they fancy us back, they raise their eyebrows in return. We’re not consciously aware of doing this rather bizarre Groucho Marx type gesture, but it’s supposedly the most instantly recognised non-verbal sign of friendly greeting in the world. It helps us to attract friends and lovers because it makes us look more attractive by pulling the eyes open and allowing more light to reflect on the surface of eyes (hence the ‘Your eyes are like large, liquid pools’ stuff) The trick is to watch for an eyebrow flash when you meet someone new. Even better, tell her you’re interested on a subconscious level by extending your eyebrow flash for up to one second.
She’s fidgeting with her clothes. If she’s adjusting her clothing or smoothing it (particularly over her hips), she’s keen. Other dead giveaways: looking down to see how many buttons she’s got undone (and emerging from the loo with a couple more open). Before you nip off to the loo, see what position her skirt is in. It’s all good news if you return to see she’s hiked it higher up her thighs.
She’s flashing her wrists. It’s particularly obvious if she smokes, because she’ll hold her cigarette high and twist her wrist so it’s turned toward you. If someone exposes their wrists to you it means they’re open and honest. People find it incredibly hard to lie with their wrists and palms exposed (so if you think someone’s acting dodgy and they’re hiding their hands, you’re probably right) It also means she’s sexually interested. Wrists are a definite erogenous zone probably because back in the days when women wore neck to knee clothing, the wrist and ankles were the only flesh ever exposed in public.
Her hands keep moving into your space. We use our hands to signal interest by moving them closer to the object of our desire. If she moves her hands across the invisible line that divides the table in two or into your personal space, her tongue really is starting to hang out.
She’s sitting with one leg tucked underneath her, so the inside of her thigh is exposed. Check her head and body also point toward you, then consider yourself wanted. She’s revealing quite an intimate part of her body: one you’d normally only see during sex.
She’s crossed her legs. The leg-cross (twining one leg around so her foot crosses behind her calf and also the ankle) is a potent, yet polite, sexual signal. Why? Well for a start, it makes her legs look good because it presses the flesh to give the appearance of high muscle tone. Which sends another subliminal message: our bodies show increased muscle tone when ready for sex as nerves and excitement make us tense and primed for performance.
She keeps on crossing and uncrossing them ever-so-s-l-o-w-l-y. The more a woman crosses and uncrosses her legs in front of a guy, the more interested she is in him. She’s deliberately trying to draw his attention to her legs and genital area. (V. naughty. Which is of course why lots of women love doing it!)
Now she’s (blimey!) kicking one leg up and down, while crossed, or dangling a shoe from her toes. Either are strong, deliberate and obvious signs she’s up for more than just coffee. First up, she’ll cross her legs toward you and begin to slowly and seductively kick her foot up and down in a thrusting motion. (If you need me to tell you why imitating thrusting is sexy, you seriously do need to get out more). If she’s really, really keen, she’ll follow this up by slipping her foot in and out of her shoe (the old in-out-in-out thing again) or dangle the shoe from the tip of her toes (I’m undressing myself already/Wouldn’t you like these shoes off and under your bed?)
She’s touching her neck, mouth and lips a lot. It’s called autoerotic touching: touching yourself where you’d like someone to touch you. As well as sending a powerful subliminal message (get your fingers over here!), it feels good! When we’re sexually aroused the blood pumps ferociously through the body, making nerve endings tingle and our skin much more sensitive to touch. (A super-sexy, sure-thing, get-the-cheque-and-get-a-cab-NOW signal: she’s touching her mouth while looking at yours!)
Whatever you do, she seems to do. It’s called mirroring and if she’s doing this, she’s yours. Nothing bonds people more instantly or effectively than mirroring someone’s behaviour. We do it subconsciously when we like someone but it’s remarkably easy to manipulate, so if she’s not mirroring you, try mirroring her and see what happens. If she leans forward to tell you something intimate, you lean in to meet her. If she sits back to take a sip of her drink, you do the same. The theory behind mirroring is that we like people who are like us. If someone’s doing what we’re doing, we feel they’re not only on the same level as us but also in the same mood we are.
PS: Before you sprint out the door to the nearest bar (or dismiss all this as a load of nonsense), you need to know The Golden Rule of Body Language: don’t ever judge on one thing alone. Like, sitting with your arms crossed can mean you’re protecting yourself emotionally. But it can also mean it’s bloody freezing/you’re having a fat day or some silly bugger just split red wine down your shirt. So don’t jump to conclusions (or pounce on every girl who happens to be dangling her shoe). Instead follow The Rule of Four: look for at least four body language signals saying the same thing before totally believing it.