From love bombing to abuse and losing everybody - domestic abuse survivor speaks out
Domestic abuse victim 'Sarah' speaks out
A woman who was love-bombed by her ex-partner before the relationship turned violent has shared her story in a bid to help others.
Sarah, not her real name, met her ex through social media. They started dating and at first, everything was positive.
Sarah said: “Things were great, he did the whole love-bombing ‘oh you’re amazing, I want to be with you, you’re perfect’ - and it was.
“It was exciting. He was going to be with one, I was going to be with him the rest of my life. It was great at first, and then things started to go downhill.”
Sarah said once this phase of the relationship ended, he started encouraging her to take drugs until eventually she was addicted and started shutting people out.
She said: “It got to the point I was continuously using because it felt like I needed to, it felt like if I said no he would get angry.
“I didn’t really speak to my friends half the time. I wasn’t speaking to anybody, I ended up losing everybody. I just can’t believe he did this to me, I can’t believe he acted this way towards me.”
When it came to ending the relationship, Sarah said it took two attempts.
She said: “The first time I tried, I left him for about a week but he was messaging me constantly and then I ended up going back because he wanted to talk and as soon as I walked through the door, he slapped me round the face.
“At that moment, I have no idea why I didn’t turn around and walk away.”
Sarah said on the day she did leave, they’d had a discussion the night before and he woke her up the next morning telling her she had until he got back from work to move out.
She said: “I had no idea how long I had to get my stuff together, but I did it. I got as much as I possibly could, I did leave quite a lot of stuff behind but I got out, and I got away.”
The number of domestic abuse victims seeking help is on the rise according to Next Link, a charity helping people across the South West.
In the last year, Avon and Somerset Police recorded nearly 22,000 cases of domestic abuse. The pandemic and the cost of living crisis are thought to be adding to the problem.
Next Link operates local domestic abuse support services in Bristol.
Refuge, the National DA helpline and PEGS - Parental Education Growth Support also offer support for domestic abuse victims.