'Life shouldn’t be a terrifying ordeal' - Cymru footballers team up to tackle gender-based violence

• Video credit: @soundcymru – Sound | Gov.Wales

Cymru men's football players have come together to discuss healthy relationship behaviours ahead of White Ribbon Day.

Ben Davies, Joe Morrell, and David Brooks feature in a new video which shows the trio talking about what men can do to help women feel safe. They are the first Cymru ambassadors to the Sound Campaign, a Welsh Government funded project.

They discuss the importance of open, honest conversations with friends, family and teammates- especially with those exhibiting red flag behaviours, as well as self-reflection on relationships.

Joe Morrell said: “The people around you are a reflection of you. A good friend comes under many umbrellas. Calling them out when needed is certainly a part of that”.

David Brooks agreed, adding: “If my friends were acting a certain way out in public, or in their relationships, I’d pull them up on it.”

The Football Association of Wales have partnered with the recently launched Sound campaign to start a conversation around gender-based violence. They hope the 15-minute YouTube and RedWall+video will encourage people to talk openly.

In the video, Ben Davies, who married his partner Emily in 2022 and recently became a father for the first time, reflected on his own relationship saying “The reason our relationship is so good, is because we're open with each other, we're honest with each other and we have each other's backs.

"Good communication is key, and I think it's important that we also have this in the dressing room." He added.

"I probably spend just as much time with my wife as I do with the boys in the football changing room. Creating those relationships is very important, being able to trust and being able to open yourself up to other people to help you out, it’s a huge thing.”

David Brooks picked up on the importance of communication, reflecting on his cancer diagnosis in 2021.

“It’s deemed to be ‘what I’m going through’ and the difficulties that I had." He explained.

"But me living through it, I didn’t find it that mentally challenging, obviously it was physically demanding but Flora had to see me on a day-to-day basis, and she didn’t want to burden me so it took a toll on her.

"It just shows that what you’re going through can affect others too, and that communication was important to get her the help she needed through the process as well.

“I’ve also had to learn to not take work stuff home, like if I've had a really bad day, for example if I'm not playing or not training very well and in that bit of a rut, not to take it home and take it out on someone around me.”

‘Small actions can have a huge impact.’

Ben Davies reflected on training that his club, Tottenham Hotspur, had recently given players to help women feel safe in public spaces and at matches.

“It was just little things like make yourself approachable, don’t be too boisterous if you’re in a group, think about how your words and actions make a woman feel. Even if it's crossing the street away from the woman to make her feel more comfortable, little things like that, especially at nighttime can have such a huge impact.

“It can be very scary for women when walking home from work, or, or walking alone after games at night.

"Men need to be aware of simple actions you can take just to make women feel more comfortable because as men, we don’t realise it so much, but if you're walking home at night alone and you're hearing on the news stories of women being abducted or killed, it's pretty awful and it's a pretty terrifying thing.

"I've got a younger sister; I can't imagine what it’s like for her to worry about making a short walk home. Life shouldn’t be a terrifying ordeal.”

Since launching in July, Sound has reached 327,000 men aged 18 - 34 in Wales, with a number reaching out to seek advice directly from campaign channels.

The FAW recently dedicated their Cymru men’s UEFA EURO Qualifying match against Turkey to White Ribbon.

Football Association of Wales CEO, Noel Mooney is incredibly proud of Ben, David and Joe's support of the Welsh Government campaign he said: “We hope the conversations between our players will encourage many other men to reach out to their friends or seek trusted, sound advice on how to address such behaviours and how to create an environment where women can feel safe.”

The Welsh Government's Violence Against Women Domestic Abuse and Sexual Violence strategy aims to draw attention to harmful behaviour such as love-bombing, gaslighting and coercive control. Minister for Social Justice and Chief Whip, Jane Hutt, said: “It is fantastic to see Senior Cymru footballers supporting the Sound campaign and speaking about their experiences of helping women feel safe.

“The Sound campaign shows that it doesn’t matter where you see harmful behaviours, whether it’s in the changing rooms or on social media, it’s imperative you recognise it and Sound it out."

The Crime Survey for England and Wales shows that from 2019 to 2020 2.3 million people are known to have experienced domestic abuse, 1.6 million of the victims being women.

The Chief Executive of White Ribbon UK, Anthea Sully, said: “We can only change the story for women and girls if men start reflecting on their own attitudes and behaviours and encouraging healthy expressions of masculinity from one another.

“The Sound campaign, along with Welsh footballers, have provided a brilliant example of what men can do to change cultures to end harmful behaviours, by challenging restrictive norms and giving each other space to have sound conversations.”

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