First Minister's Questions
With the summer break, looming on the horizon, it would be no surprise to hear that the FM was in a mellow and generous mood. True, there was much to try his patience, thanks to those members still intent on asking their pesky questions. Instead of spending his spare time pouring over those holiday brochures, it was still homework round the kitchen table, revising subjects as far apart as teaching future generations about Welsh history. What did they think St Fagan's and the telly was for? To that irritating subject of electrification. Without a doubt , there were some people in this chamber he would like to see electrified!
But it was that Kirsty Williams who got his goat with her smart aleck questions about pupil premiums.
Well! Who would have thought it! Politcians taking credit for other politicians efforts! Never!
But the FM was still in good humour, those swaying palms and blue holiday skies now just over the horizon. No! He was not going to be nettled by this:
With a benign wave of the hand, the FM must have hoped that was the end of the matter. But no such luck. There she was again bobbing up with another question. Kirsty Williams wanted to know if the Liberal Democrat's pupil premium was his proudest achievement this year! The cheek of it. Can't let this one go by!
One down two to go. Next with more pesky questions, Andrew RT Davies. What's bothering him? Predictably he's bringing up the matter of electrification. The achievements of the Heathrow spur improving connectivity to South Wales and the electrifying of the Valleys line and that of the line to Swansea. But wait! RT is now asking isn't it time for the FM to get his act together, like those lovely people in charge at Westminster?
Ooh! The holiday spirit and any last trace of generosity vanished in a puff of smoke. The FM tartly replied that he looked forward to agreement with the Westminster Government over the Barnet floor, borrowing and Silk part one. The slow coaches! And as far as electrification was concerned it was only something re announced that had already been put forward by a previous Labour Government! What? More politicians claiming credit for other politicians hard work! Never!
Two down, only one to go. Up steps Leanne Wood, Leader of Plaid Cymru, fresh as a daisy with a new deputy announced today, Elin Jones. Instead of a shopping list of items for the forthcoming happy holidays, Leanne had compiled a list of apparent failures of the Welsh Labour Government.
But the FM was on the home straight now, the tantalising vision of a deck chair, a cool beer and a knotted hanky on his head.
He flung back these words at Leanne Wood:
And he read from his list. It should have been the Welsh Government's measures to stimulate the Economy. Alas the list he read from said ''suncream, book , beach towel''.
Oh dear!
Happy Holidays!