Domestic abuse survivor who battled cancer supports new toolkit to identify victims
ITV News Meridian's Sally Simmonds spoke to 'Nicky' about her experience
A woman from Kent who survived domestic abuse while undergoing treatment for breast cancer is sharing her experience to help others.
Not wishing to reveal her identity, 'Nicky' says she was punched so violently that she lost her front teeth and still suffers pain from a fractured jaw.
Aged 19, she married an older, richer, charismatic man.
'Nicky' said: "I met the man of my dreams, before I knew it I was living in a gilded cage.
"I feared for my life constantly, I lived in a state of fear. I was scared all the time and I tried to keep him quiet, to keep him happy, but it didn't matter, we'd have a fantastic day out somewhere and at the end of it, I'd have a punch in the face.
"I had my front teeth punched out and a fractured jaw, I'm still in pain with my face now.
"I was laying on the floor with my teeth next to me covered in blood and he kicked me and went to bed."
When 'Nicky' was diagnosed with breast cancer, the abuse turned financial. The diagnosis gave her the courage to leave.
She said: "When you have a diagnosis like cancer, it changes your perspective. Even though I was going through chemotherapy on my own, I just didn't want it any more.
"If I'd had him back, I don't think I'd be here now."
Research shows that while domestic abuse usually starts before someone is diagnosed with a serious illness, it often escalates.
Experts at the University of Southampton have evidence that those with life-limiting illnesses, who depend on their partner for help, are particularly vulnerable to domestic abuse.
Dr Michelle Myall, Senior Researcher, University of Southampton, said: "Illness can be a trigger for abuse but often it pre-dates the illness and it can be exacerbated once a diagnosis is given."
'Nicky' has helped to launch a guidance package, called the DALLI Toolkit, giving professionals the tools to identify abuse victims and respond.
It is hoped that the guidance will be rolled out across the UK and abroad.
'Nicky' hopes her honesty about her experience will help others find the strength to act.
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