Child abuser from Thirsk jailed as victim's wife says impact turned family 'upside down'

The wife of a man who was sexually abused by a former scout leader as a young boy has spoken of the "heartbreaking" impact of finding out what had happened to her husband decades later.

David Kitching, from Thirsk, North Yorkshire, was jailed for nine years on Thursday after being found guilty of three counts of indecent assault and six of gross indecency.

The 59-year-old, who committed the offences in the 1990s, was only arrested after his victim came forward in 2021.

In a statement given to York Crown Court, the victim's wife said her family's lives were "turned upside down" when her husband opened up about what had happened.

She described how her husband, who cannot be named for legal reasons, became suicidal, saying: "Having to listen to my husband tell me that he wanted to kill himself and drive a kitchen knife into his skull to stop the flashbacks he was experiencing, was truly heartbreaking.

“Over the coming months, I had to ensure that he did not take his own life and became his protector from the world, whilst also trying to raise our children without them feeling the hurt and pain around them."

The woman said their son had become a "trigger" for her husband, adding: "I began to look at our little boy through tainted eyes. I saw all those things that happened to my husband every time I looked at him. Alongside this, I lived every day fearing that by the end of it I would no longer have a husband."

She said Kitching's sentence was "only the beginning" for her husband, and that it would never undo what happened to him.

"It will never give him back the time he lost with his own children and it will never undo the strain it has had on our marriage and our mental health,” she said.

Det Con Jason Roper, who led the investigation, said Kitching had tried to discredit the victim throughout the trial.

“Kitching continues to protest his innocence, even though he was found guilty by the jury," he said.

“This is the true measure of the man and it underlines his sheer cruelty in subjecting the victim to the additional trauma of reliving the sickening abuse at the trial.

“As for the victim, I have nothing but respect for his bravery in coming forward to the police and allowing justice to be secured in this case.

“He was incredibly courageous during the trial and his testimony was profound and compelling. "

As well as his prison term, Kitching was given an extended licence period of one year and will stay on the sex offender register indefinitely.

The victim impact statement in full:

“When my husband disclosed to me what had happened, our life turned upside down. I knew deep down inside over the months previously that something wasn’t right, but I told myself that it was the pressure of having two young children, running a house and having a career that would soon pass.

“What came in September 2020 was nothing I could have ever imagined having to go through. Having to listen to my husband tell me that he wanted to kill himself and drive a kitchen knife into his skull to stop the flashbacks he was experiencing, was truly heartbreaking.

“Over the coming months, I had to ensure that he did not take his own life and became his protector from the world, whilst also trying to raise our children without them feeling the hurt and pain around them.

“I have physically picked him up from the floor, held his hand through some of the worst conversations of his life and supported him through each step of this process. However, with that came an immense amount of pressure to keep it together for my own family. 

“During these months, I had to access counselling to help process the deep sadness I felt each day. I think for myself, one of the worst parts I have had to overcome is blocking out the details my husband gave to me.

“Knowing that his own son was a trigger meant I began to look at our little boy through tainted eyes. I saw all those things that happened to my husband every time I looked at him. Alongside this, I lived every day fearing that by the end of it I would no longer have a husband.

“As the months passed, I decided to change career and, when people ask me why, I usually tell them it was always my plan. However, if I am honest with you, it was because I knew I needed a better income to support my children if I became a single parent.

“I have lived every single day of my life since my husband’s breakdown with an element of uncertainty and anxiety for how my life may look in the future. I will never stop asking him how he is feeling and fearing that his memories could one day take him away from me.

“As I sit here, writing the words, I think about how much hurt and sadness we have dealt with and how it has changed the wife and mother that I am today. 

“The feelings of sadness, anger and anxiety did not end with a guilty verdict. In fact, the guilty verdict was only the beginning of this chapter for my husband.

“It will never undo what happened to him and it will never give him back his childhood.

“It will never give him back the time he lost with his own children and it will never undo the strain it has had on our marriage and our mental health.”

Want a quick and expert briefing on the biggest news stories? Listen to our latest podcasts to find out What You Need To Know.