Once upon a time, in a villa not too far away, lived a beautiful fire-breathing PrincessAnd the handsome Earl of Essex, Nathan The Princess was smitten as soon as she laid eyes on those pink flamingo shortsPrince Nathan was eager to make a good impression...He took her to the beach where they sipped champagne (or a high brand cava) and talked about all the important stuffUntil Nathan said the two words no Princess ever wants to hear - 'frigid' and 'porn'Prince Nathan was immediately banished to the garden for his foolish ways(He did manage to enjoy a good leg hump though)The Prince worked his magic and they soon celebrated their one week anniversary They even survived cooking together, which is a tremendous featBut then, one day, Princess Cara let one rip, and the cracks began to show...They spent days and nights bickering outside yonder villaBut then decided that instead of arguing they wanted to go to Disneyland instead. Aww. The Prince and Princess rode their stallions through the depths of the Mallorca forest And then one special day, a little Massey De La Hoyde came into the world. Luckily, they sent her straight backThe Prince's mother arrived and the Princess (maybe wrongly on their first ever meeting) told her that she wanted babies with her son!But all was OK and they laughed it off, as the pair finished the series declaring their LOVE (yes they said it!) for each other
